She Won't be Forgot...

A week ago today (December 7, 2010) my Aunt Phyllis passed away at her home in Columbia City, Indiana at the age of 88. Due to my own negligence (not checking voice mail for two days – shame on me!) I didn't find out about it until Wednesday night. On Thursday morning I left the nice warm home of my friend in northeast Louisiana and headed to the frigid north. After 900 miles, seven states, two time zones, crossing the Mississppi River three times, and 25 hours later, I arrived home safely Friday morning. Visitation was Friday afternoon and the service was Saturday morning.

But I wasn't the only one to drive a long distance to pay my respects to Aunt Phyllis – her sister, my Aunt Shirley drove from Maryland and my older brother Doug came down from Minneapolis. As her daughter Kathy said, it was a testament to how much Phyllis was loved that we would drive so far to be able to be in her presence one last time. [Update 2:30 pm - I had a memory lapse... Phyllis' grandson Jameson Mitchell and his mother Emmy flew in from California to attend the services.]

It was nice to see many of my cousins and their children, some whom I hadn't seen in many years, and their grandchildren, some whom I had never seen. Though it was sad that death is what brought us together there was joy and happiness in sharing stories and memories of Aunt Phyllis and honoring her long life, one well lived.

One word was spoken over and over during those two days that describes Aunt Phyllis – Special. And that she was. Not only was she so very special, Aunt Phyllis had the ability to make you feel special. She didn't condemn. She didn't judge. She listened. And she talked, and boy, was she a talker! She never spoke badly about anyone. Never an unkind word to or about anyone. She was kind, gentle and loving, and one of the nicest people I have ever known. She was Special.

Aunt Phyllis sometimes did silly or “stupid” things. But she was able to laugh at herself. One of my favorite stories about her involves a little night light that wasn't!

Phyllis and Walt lived in Columbia City in an old two-story house that was difficult to keep warm in the winter. During one particularly cold winter in the 1960s they purchased an electric blanket. It was their first one and she was quite pleased with it. One day while showing it to her brother Bill, after raving about how well it was keeping them warm and comfortable at night, she commented that they didn't need the night light that was on the control so she always turned it off. When Bill pointed out that the “night light” was actually a light to indicate that the blanket was turned on she laughed about it and got through the embarrassment and the story has been told over and over through the years.

Phyllis Elizabeth Phend was born in Columbia City, Indiana on September 29, 1922 and was the first child of Rolland Victor and Hazlette (Brubaker) Phend. She lived most of her life in Whitley County, graduating from Larwill High School with the Class of 1940. Phyllis married Walter Eugene Mitchell on December 6, 1942 (the day before the bombing of Pearl Harbor). She passed away on December 7, 2010 (the day after what would have been their 68th wedding anniversary).

Phyllis and Walt opened “Mitchell's Bait and Tackle” store in their home in Columbia City in 1946. They kept it going for 23 years closing it down in 1969. Walt was also a collector of post cards and old bottles, while Phyllis loved collecting buttons and old dolls. For many years they attended shows and auctions buying and selling their stuff. And since Aunt Phyllis “never knew a stranger” they always had a good time while doing it. She enjoyed it immensely.

Phyllis was the mother of five children: Kathy, Mike, Patrick (died in an accident in 1948 at the age of two), Jim and Kevin. She had 8 grandchildren, 12 great grandchildren, 4 step-great-grandchildren and was expecting 1 great-great-grandchild due in March of 2011. She was a “second Mom” to many of the kids in the neighborhood.

Mike, Kathy, Walt, Phyllis, Kevin, Jim
I think this was taken at their 50th wedding anniversary in December 1992.

March 2008. The siblings.

Patricia, William, Shirley, Virginia, and Phyllis (seated).

In Memoriam - Walter Eugene Mitchell (1921-2006)

My uncle, Walter Eugene Mitchell, was born October 25, 1921 in Whitley County, Indiana and died May 30, 2006 at Columbia City, Whitley County, Indiana. He was the son of Clarice M. and Sarah Goldie (Killian) Mitchell.

Walt graduated from Columbia City High School with the Class of 1940 and spent his entire lifetime in Whitley County with the exception of a few years in Laporte, Indiana. He married Phyllis Elizabeth Phend on a snowy, wintry day - December 6th, 1942 - at the home of the bride's parents. Phyllis is the daughter of Hazlette Brubaker and Rolland Victor Phend.

Phyllis and Walt opened a bait and tackle store in their home in Columbia City in 1946. They kept the store for 23 years closing it down in 1969. Walt was also one of Columbia City's top bowlers between 1954 and 1974. In 1964 Walt was employed as a machinist and store keeper for Monsanto Plastic Company in Ligonier, Indiana. The company produced numerous plastic products, including mud flaps for trucks. Walt retired from Monsanto in 1984.

Walt also collected post cards and vintage bottles. His postcard collection started in 1928 when he was 7 years old. He purchased two cards at Trier's Park in Fort Wayne. One card was of Tom Mix and the other was of "Our Gang". In the mid-eighties his collection of post cards numbered between 25-30 thousand cards. They were everywhere! He continued to collect post cards and after his retirement the collection reached 50,000 cards. It was then that Phyllis and Walt started traveling to post card and bottle shows throughout Indiana, Michigan, and Ohio selling and buying. About 10 years ago they had several auctions, selling most of their post cards and bottles.

In addition to his wife, Phyllis, he was survived by one daughter, three sons, eight grandchildren, eleven great grandchildren and one brother, Clarice Mitchell of Columbia City. He was preceded in death by his parents, one son, 2 year old Patrick Allen Mitchell who died in an auto accident in 1948, one grandson, Michael W. Mitchell and two sisters, Ethel Nicodemus and Naomi Trier.

In Memoriam - Michael Eugene Mitchell (1944-2007)

Michael Eugene Mitchell, my first cousin, passed away Saturday evening May 26, 2007 at the home of his mother in Columbia City, Whitley County, Indiana. He was 62 years old. Mike was the son of Phyllis Elizabeth Phend and Walter Eugene Mitchell and was born November 1, 1944 in Noble County, Indiana. Mike attended school in Columbia City, where he lived for most of his life. On June 4, 1966 he was married to Sharon Marie Ball. He is survived by three children and five grandchildren as well as his mother, a sister, and two brothers. He was preceded in death by his father, a brother, and a still-born child.

Although Mike was one of the "older" cousins, he was usually good with us younger kids and willing to play with us and spend time with us when we visited his home while growing up, and that was nearly every weekend! Our parents would play cards, usually Euchre, on Saturday nights. While they played cards, we'd pop corn, watch television, play games and just have a good time. As he got into high school, he didn't spend as much time with us and he did tease us mercilessly, but it was generally good-natured fun.

Mike enjoyed taking care of his potted plants and had a collection of old bottles he'd inherited from his father that gave him a great deal of pleasure. At the past couple of Phend Family Reunions he volunteered to be the auctioneer for the "White Elephant" auction fund raiser that helped pay for the expenses of the reunion. He had a lot of fun with it and did a good job too.

In the past 10 years or so, Mike has had health problems, dealing with back pain among other ailments. A couple of years ago he was injured in a car accident and his health has gone downhill ever since. Several weeks ago he was diagnosed with lung cancer but I don't think that was the cause of his death. Saturday afternoon Mike went with his mother and sister to visit the gravesite of his father and little brother. They had talked about many of the people they had known who had passed away. When they got back home, they had a piece of rhubarb pie. Mike was tired and went into the bedroom to take a nap. He never woke up. May he rest in peace.

Visitation will be Wednesday, May 30th, from 2-4 and 6-8 p.m. at DeMoney-Grimes Countryside Park Funeral Home in Columbia City. Services will be held there at 10 a.m. Thursday, May 31st.